1999 Brier
SLAM! Sports
SLAM! Curling
1999 BRIER
ON THE ROCKS
INTERACTIVE
ALSO ON SLAM!
Just take 'em, please!
The Brier brought on a variety of wellness and beauty complaints among spectators and participants alike, many of whom could easily have been addressed just across the street at the Edmonton Woman's Show. Guy Hemmings, Avanti hairstylists were waiting at the AgriCom. Folks at the Beautyclub booth suggest trying aromatherapy for a sore throat, Mr. Howard.
And for a six-foot-four, 255-pound farmer - say, Gerald Shymko? Let Esther Ford tell you about Calodan, a drink to keep you slender for those extra-enders.
"A friend of mine, five-foot-nine, lost about 30 pounds after a month - he's a farmer, too," explained Ford, adding that Shymko "should take it right before his head hits the pillow, after a three-hour fast."
I think I already see a problem ...
Majella Morin saw it coming - from a distance. The curling fan raised in La Beauce, Que., was stuck inside the Woman's Show all weekend, rooting for Hemmings' rink and looking for a chance to sneak into the final via the back door, just like Quebec did.
"I expect Manitoba to take it," said Morin, shackled to the booth of Visual Links, his on-line shopping mall run from Edmonton. "I'm from Quebec so of course I hope they'd win - the other guy has no presence at all ... I'll trade you my postcard for that media pass!"
Thought, but not said, at the Brier:
Tell that reporter to put his shirt back on.
You're the sexiest man at the Brier? Wow! Meet the smartest man in the army!
The volunteers here have the best-looking shirts in the history of rodeo clowns.
We could get the ice just perfect if we could get rid of the dirt, dust, water, air and people.
I'm going to a hockey game to try to warm myself up.
Why wasn't there a bar with a concrete-bunker theme before the Brier Patch?
Lady, if you yell "Fifty-fifties!" one more time I'm sticking this pin in your neck.
I'm sorry, Mr. Shymko, your 'posse' has to leave.
Even the lost-and-found had a certain geriatric quality to it. The items left behind by fans included several pairs of glasses, dinner-theatre tickets and a pill bottle of premarin, an estrogen replacement.