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 If you've ever travelled with a mate, you understand that getaways are more than just a pretty, romantic backdrop, but also the potential breeding grounds for turbulence. (Clipart.com) |
There's the chemistry connection, sure, but even heated attraction can wane when a new flame gets on your nerves.
Years ago during an evening primed with cocktails and cool tunes, I met a talented visual artist whose good looks (think Ethan Hawke in his hot days) made me melt.
That night, we bonded over Basquiat, Sonic Youth and a mutual love of New York City. Sadly, he also drove me nuts.
After that first night of discovery, we rarely were on the same page and, even when we were, you'd never know it from how vastly different our interpretations were.
I craved the exhilarating buzz of a well-turned phrase, he communicated best through abstract art.
Here was an incredible guy with immense talent who'd undoubtedly make name for himself artistically (he did), but it didn't change the fact that we only worked in really small doses.
As a travel junkie, this wouldn't do.
There was no way we could've spent days on end sharing a crammed hotel room or cruising around The Big Apple.
Sure, eventually we realize that finding someone who's never going to irritate us is about as likely as meeting a politician who never lies, but ultimately the question becomes: Is this person generally tolerable?
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As my boyfriend and I prepare for a two-week getaway to B.C., then Mexico, it's a test likely bigger than living together. If you've ever travelled with a mate, you understand that getaways are more than just a pretty, romantic backdrop, but also the potential breeding grounds for turbulence.
Escaping daily responsibilities is one thing, trouble is, travelling with a partner offers little chance of escaping them too. With nothing else demanding your time, you're around each other 24-7. I've known many couples who've vacationed together only to discover it would be their last before booking a return flight to Singles-Ville.
Want to experience a successful couples' getaway? With a little preparation, it can be done. Here is the ultimate packing list for bliss-boosting relationship survival:
1. Ear plugs: Trust me, it's a small price to pay for silence on the airplane or a peaceful night of zzz.
2. Personal music device: Provides a convenient escape for whenever you need one.
3. Eye mask: Perfect for blocking TV and reading lights
4. Books. Magazines. A writing Journal: Great to have for quick and easy dose of 'me' time.
5. Bubble bath: Lock the door, shut out the world and sink into the suds.
6. A GPS, necessary for road trippers and, in terms of argument-proofing your journey, it sure beats the tired, old road map.
7. A laptop. Allows you to send notes to friends, update your Facebook status, watch a DVD, listen to the radio, or start your Google list (all the curiosities you've been meaning to look up, like how giraffes are transported, for instance).
8. An agreed upon plan that also leaves room for compromise and flexibility: Without this in place, you may as well start warming up for a good scrap in the verbal boxing ring.
Think of these eight nuggets as a mini escape plan, or alternatively, sanity made simple. Seriously, load up on the earplugs, packs some good reads and bring along an eye mask for those essential time outs. After all, even the happiest of couples need personal space sometimes (if they're going to tolerate one another for the long haul, that is.)
E-mail me at: tanya.enberg@sunmedia.ca.