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SLAM! WRESTLING: Guest Columnist

SLAM! Sports
SLAM! Wrestling







Tuesday, June 8, 1999

SLAM! Wrestling Guest Column

Sable too big for her bra

By CHRIS W. ENGLER -- For SLAM! Wrestling

Does anyone else out there find Sable's pending lawsuit against the WWF as much of a joke as I do? She claims that, for among other reasons, that the WWF was going to "force her" to expose her bare breasts on TV. As much as I found it ironic that Sable (Oops! I mean "Rena Mero") would complain about something like this after having just completed her second Playboy spread, I will concede to her that doing a "classy" pictoral spread for Playboy is different from bearing all to a live crowd of 10,000+ on television. But how short does Ms. Mero and her lawyer think our memories are? Wasn't it just about a year ago that she appeared on a PPV with nothing covering her bare breasts except some body paint?

Sable poses with the WWF Women's title in January 1999. -- Craig Robertson, Toronto Sun
For more Sable pics, see our Photo Gallery.
Rena Mero's biggest problem is that her ego has increased at a much higher rate than her marketability. I fail to see why Sable feels that she is worth $110 million to any organization. Let's look at Sable academically... She's a lousy wrestler that requires her matches to be scripted from A to Z, she has mediocre mic skills at best, and she actually gets in the ring and wrestles about once every two months in matches five minutes or less in length. You know it, I know it, and deep down Sable knows it.... she's T&A and little else. To borrow a line from CRZ, I think it would be more accurate to put "Sable's Breasts" on the on-screen graphic when she enters the ring.

Wrestling is chauvanistic. I can admit it. Like it or lump it, the women in wrestling in the 1990s are there as eye-candy for the overwhelmingly male audience. I'm not saying it's right or wrong or the way it ought or ought not to be... I'm just making an observation. Why else would a phenomenal female wrestler like Luna Vachon be forced to continually "do the job" to the likes of Sable and, indeed, eventually get fired because of back-stage heat between the two? Let's look at the more popular "Women of the WWF", shall we?

- Sable
- Tori
- Ivory
- Jacqueline
- Terri Runnels
- DeBRA
- Ryan Shamrock
- Mrs. Cleavage

It doesn't take a Rhodes Scholar to figure out why they're in the WWF. Granted... Tori, Jacqueline, and Ivory are decent female wrestlers in their own right. But I think that one need only look at the way they're attired to know the primary reason that they're there. Are these women being exploited? Perhaps.

Are they being degraded? Hard to say no, categorically. But... I have a feeling that these women are all very well compensated for what they do. Without passing judgment on the WWF and their treatment of women, all I can say is that the women that are in the WWF are smart enough to know why they're there and they're probably paid pretty well to do it. I'm not saying that the WWF's women should "know their role and shut their mouth" but I think this is just another case of if you feel more exploited or cheapened than your salary justifies, then leave the organization.

What really bugs me is how much of an opportunistic vulture "Sable & Company" are being. In all honesty, I doubt that Sable was smart enough to come up with the idea for this lawsuit all on her own. Now, instead of being exploited by the big-bad-WWolF, some slick-talking, glorified ambulance chaser has seen a juicy contingency fee in the offing. This lawsuit would probably not even have seen the light of day were it not for the WWF's current diminished stature due to the death of Owen Hart. I agree with Owen's brother, Smith Hart, when he said "If she (Sable) wants $110 million, Martha (Owen's widow) and her estate should sue for $110 billion."

But I think this will all not mean much in the end. From a legal standpoint, I think that Sable won't have a leg to stand on. She was in the WWF for more than two years and in that time she participated in story-lines as "racy" as the ones she's indicating in her lawsuit. If she felt so "exploited" then why did she hang around for so long? Furthermore, I think that Sable is unaware of how easily she will be replaced. Does she really think that another siliconed-up statuesque blonde willing to wear skimpy outfits into a wrestling ring will be THAT hard for the WWF to find?

The fans are fickle, Sable... just ask Sunny. Maybe you'd be better off seeing how much money your implants would fetch on eBay?


Chris W. Engler is from North York, ON and can be emailed at cengler@wrestlemail.com.

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